Comments on: Five things fertility problems have taught me

By: Ruby

Ruby — Thu, 28 Nov 2013 21:06:17 +0000

Thanks for replying. I truly hope you get all your dreams fulfilled.

By: Sara - Darling Lovely Life editor

Sara - Darling Lovely Life editor — Wed, 27 Nov 2013 14:50:36 +0000

It differs agency to agency, social worker to social worker. The idea is you’re meant to have the energy to care for a child and they want you to stay alive until the child is twenty. Individual assessment decides that.

Also the childcare hours differs agency to agency, region to region xxx

By: Ruby

Ruby — Wed, 27 Nov 2013 14:47:46 +0000

I know of quite a few people who have struggled with fertility. I think that it is really brave of you to lay part of your heart for all to see. It was very touching.

It seems to me like you have seriously considered adoption. I am just wondering if you could share more about that because I really did not know that being overweight is a hindrance or that you need to put in childcare hours too prior to adopting. I have not really seen much prior to this blog about that. Would definitely be keen to read more on that.

By: LinsDCB

LinsDCB — Tue, 26 Nov 2013 21:15:25 +0000

Thank you for sharing this wonderful post. We have been TTC for over 5 years now and have been “diagnosed” with unexplained infertility. We have been married 7 years and pretty much from the get-go people have been asking when we would be having children. Then, we got tons of “oh well, it takes a REALLY strong couple to want to have children, may be you guys just aren’t there yet” which actually really made me want to turn violent!! People just don’t think.

Similarly to you, I also feel totally blessed to have a wonderful life with a great job, and also running my own business. I wake up every day understanding it is a gift just to be alive. And I too have a fantastically supportive husband, and we know that it may be us two minus children for the rest of our days. Again, this is something that people don’t seem to get and/or feel threatened by. I keep getting told “of course your husband is the most important person now who you love the most but once you have children he will be bottom of the pile”. Well, I pity those husbands that applies to.

The next part of our journey starts early Jan as we have been approved for NHS IVF treatment. I’m excited and scared to see what that holds. I wish you and your Mr all the happiness and love on your own journey xx

By: Sara - Darling Lovely Life editor

Sara - Darling Lovely Life editor — Tue, 26 Nov 2013 08:51:18 +0000

Thanks Em :) yes there’s a whole world of information when it comes to adoption that most people wouldn’t realise until they really looked into it! Not an easy process xxx

By: Sara - Darling Lovely Life editor

Sara - Darling Lovely Life editor — Tue, 26 Nov 2013 08:50:24 +0000

<3 xxxx

By: Sara - Darling Lovely Life editor

Sara - Darling Lovely Life editor — Tue, 26 Nov 2013 08:50:14 +0000

Sorry to hear that, Kate – I’m so glad you found the post helpful. Huge hugs xxx

By: Kate

Kate — Tue, 26 Nov 2013 08:31:24 +0000

Thank you Sara. It is good to know that people are willing to speak out; I myself am off to hospital tomorrow to deal with my own condition. Your post has come at a very good time for me as I have been working myself up about it. It’s nice to know that other people are able and willing to speak about their problems. I don’t currently have a partner but like you “I know” I want children; whether I have them naturally, foster or adopt. Thank you for your blogs, they are so very helpful. I wish you and John all the best with your future xx

By: Annie

Annie — Mon, 25 Nov 2013 23:59:37 +0000

This is a very important post Sara… Thank you for sharing this… The conditions for adoption break my heart… (Body fascism again) this makes me want to dedicate more efforts into altering these policies… Xx

By: Em

Em — Mon, 25 Nov 2013 18:00:48 +0000

Thank you so much for sharing this. Something a friend went through made me realise how insensitive it can be to ask either whether someone will be having kids soon or whether they are pregnant. Funny how people seem to not think twice about asking these very personal questions. I try not to ask or make such comments anymore.

With regard to your points on adoption – the more I read, the more shocked I became. I didn’t realise most of what you said and than you for raising awareness – if adoption is something we end up needing to consider, it is good to have more idea of the possible issues.

I wish you all the best whatever the future brings and again want to say thank you for such a positive and eye opening post x