These last couple of months have been quite difficult. There has been a long illness and sad passing in my family. However, one thing that has been reaffirmed a million times over is the importance of having the right people around you – not just at a difficult time (although it really helps) but all the time.
Having the right people around you will guarantee you a much happier, easier and less stressful life – so how do you find your people? And how do you know when a relationship is no longer good for you?
Surround yourself with people you love and who love you
No more frenemies. No more friends you suspect secretly want you to fail and no more friends you’d happily see fall flat on their face. These kinds of toxic relationships do nothing for your happiness. The first step to surrounding yourself with amazing people is to stop making time for people who don’t deserve your time. Stop letting these dynamics become your norm and make room for something much better in your life.
Good people build each other up
In my experience, people have enough trouble getting rid of negative voices in their heads without having negative voices in their ear too. Friends who criticise, ridicule or make you feel bad aren’t real friends. There’s a difference between honesty because you care and cruelty because you’re bitter. Good friends will encourage you when you doubt yourself – they’ll tell you you’re wonderful when you don’t believe it yourself. True friends accept you the way you are and love you anyway!
Real friends are there for the bad times
When the going gets really tough, true friends don’t disappear – they pick up the phone. If you have a friend who runs for the hills every time something awful happens in your life, then they may not be the best person to have around you.
Good friendships are reciprocal
Your friends aren’t your supporting cast, they’re your friends. That means that you’re there for them as much as they’re there for you and vice versa. If you have a friend who’s always dumping their problems on you without a care for how you’re doing then it may be time to ditch.
You just come away feeling good
Whenever I talk to one of my good friends, I come away feeling happy and positive – no matter what the content of the conversation was. When someone is on your wavelength, is supportive, cares as much about you as you do about them and doesn’t try to tear you down, you will always come away from an interaction with them feeling wonderful. And that’s the way it should be!
Are you surrounded by awesome people? Have you started to cut out people who make you feel bad about yourself? Thoughts are always welcome in the comment box!