On weddings and fears – a groom’s retrospective post

Back in June I wrote about my fears and nervousness for our then-upcoming wedding. With the wedding over, I decided to re-read what I’d written and see how much of it came true!

It’s all going wrong!

My biggest fear was that something wouldn’t go right, that some detail would be overlooked or something would happen later than planned. On the morning of the wedding, these worries had me shaking with fear. The preparation the previous evening had gone well, I was (relatively) well rested after a late night chatting with two of my groomsmen, and I was at the hotel we were staying at on the wedding night. Why was I such a mess? I really don’t know – it was raining a little bit and I guess that set my mind racing.

Luckily, as I went down to the hotel bar to meet up with my parents and groomsmen, my best man had a pint of beer waiting for me. I don’t recommend going to a wedding half cut, but a lunchtime pint and a bowl of chips sorted my nerves out amazingly well! After that, I was just excited. There was a small bout of nerves waiting for the registrars to arrive (I was in a holding area so I didn’t accidentally see the bride) but that all passed.

A fear of crying

My fear of crying proved to be well founded, though. As my beautiful bride began to make her entrance, and the bridesmaids and groomsmen began to come into view, I said to my best man, “here come the waterworks…” and did they ever. I held it together (just about) during the two ceremonies but there were definitely tears when the future Mrs made her entrance.

Real men aren’t afraid to cry! Image © Satureyes

Don’t let me down

I was afraid of being let down by suppliers as well – but, with the exception of a last-minute cancellation from the chair rental company, all of our suppliers were fabulous. From the marquee company setting up in record time AND helping our planner put the lights up, to the professional wait staff, to the amazing photographer and videographer, they were all incredible. I needn’t have worried.

To top it all off the new chair hire company that literally saved the wedding were exceptionally professional and understanding. I’ve got to give a shout out to the guys from the marquee company who helped us shift ten seriously heavy tables the morning after the wedding; each of them could carry a table that it took four of the rest of us to move. What a relief! We were so relieved we even parted with one of the leftover cases of beer as a thank you!

Don’t stop me now, I’m having such a good time!

Finally, I was afraid the guests wouldn’t have a good time. I am so relieved to cross that fear off the list! It was an amazing day! It was such a blur but some of the highlights were my groomsmen sneaking off to grab cold beer during the meal (the beer was for the evening!); my dad reminding them he’d kept us all in beer at university whenever he visited, so they should get a few for him too; our 81 year old neighbour dancing away to two full sets of Israeli dancing; and everyone there, mingling, having a blast. I don’t think it’s an exaggeration to say people enjoyed themselves, just a little bit!

So whoever said that it’ll be OK on the day was right – when you’re there, and it’s happening, and you’re saying your vows, everything else really does pale into insignificance. It becomes about you, your beloved, and the celebration of your love. If I have one piece of advice for grooms it’s this: don’t worry. It will all come together, and it is so worth it.

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