Last night I was watching a Don’t Tell the Bride recap episode, where couples from previous shows looked back on their behaviour while the groom planned the wedding.
What interested me the most about the brides reflecting on their actions was how contrite they all seemed – for coming across like a Bridezilla. That’s what inspired me to write this post. Well, that, and I also had a dream about Godzilla last night (yes, Godzilla).
If you’re reading this blog, you’re probably thinking you’re more Shabby Chic Bride than Bridezilla. However, I was having a very interesting conversation with a well-known and fabulous industry hairdresser the other night who said something very interesting: “all brides are the same – even if they think they’re different. They all want their wedding to be impressive.” So perhaps there’s a little Bridezilla in all of us.
So here’s my little Bridezilla quiz – answer honestly!
How involved is your groom in the wedding planning?
a.) Very involved – we have long discussions about the important decisions and make them as a team.
b.) I show him things. He grunts. I go ahead with them.
c.) He’s not remotely interested – I have to do everything myself.
d.) He keeps trying to help, but he’s mad if he thinks I’m going to trust him with anything!
How do you refer to the wedding?
a.) Our wedding or the wedding.
b.) My wedding.
c.) Mostly “our wedding” but occasionally a “my” slips out!
d.) My party. Or, to be more specific, my pretty white dress party.
How often do you talk about the wedding?
a.) Only when people ask or when I’m talking to suppliers or my groom – I wouldn’t want to bore people.
b.) I try to keep wedding talk at a minimum but do tend to go on a bit if asked.
c.) I probably talk about it more than I should, but hey, you only get married once, right?
d.) All the time. To everyone who’ll listen. Even the postman knows what my centrepieces will look like.
How did you choose your bridesmaids?
a.) Easy. I chose my closest friends – the people I love enough to have around me on my big day.
b.) I chose a mixture of close friends and family.
c.) I chose people who seemed most helpful and “into” the wedding.
d.) I deliberately chose bridesmaids who wouldn’t upstage me. Wait till they see their dresses!
How far in advance did you plan everything?
a.) Plan? I’ve just booked things as and when – going with the flow.
b.) Booked the essentials around a year in advance but sort of left everything else to the last minute.
c.) Booked and planned everything around a year in advance – I’ll need a year to sort out last-minute details.
d.) I’ve been planning my wedding since before I could talk. In fact, if you look closely at my childhood crayon scribblings, you can just about make out a hand-tied bouquet of garden roses and peonies!
How many suppliers do you meet before you choose one?
a.) Meet? I go with whoever has the nicest website!
b.) I shortlist a few on the phone or via email, then meet one or two.
c.) I make a comprehensive shortlist based on reviews and style – then I meet at least five based on their attitude on the phone before I make my final decision.
d.) I meet as many as possible – and bring a detailed list of questions (with a ranking system) to decide who’s most suitable.
Which of these statements rings most true for you?
a.) A wedding is the union of two people in love, who are committing to spend the rest of their lives together. All other details seem inconsequential.
b.) A wedding is about committing your life to the person you love – but it’s a real also once-in-a-lifetime occasion and should be treated as such. If things go wrong it’s a shame, but it’s not the end of the world.
c.) If you’ve decided to get married, you’re probably already in a loving, committed relationship. A wedding is about throwing the party to end all parties to celebrate and it’s hard to do that if things go wrong.
d.) Every girl should be a princess on her wedding day – and it all has to be perfect.
Your favourite wedding film (of the following is)
a.) My Big Fat Greek Wedding. It’s a simple love story of two people crossing cultural bridges in order to spend the rest of their lives together. Despite the name, the wedding is all about family and the couple never go too OTT.
b.) The Wedding Singer. It’s about a girl planning her dream wedding – which is, of course, important. But it’s not complete until she finds her dream groom.
c.) The Wedding Planner – how apt that someone who spends their life planning lavish weddings probably gets her own – we wonder what she’ll come up with!
d.) Bride Wars. June at the Plaza? Sigh. If my best friend stole my wedding date, there’d probably be a low level war.
A close friend gets engaged while you’re planning your wedding. Your first thought is:
a.) I’m so happy that she’s found the love of her life!
b.) I’m really happy for her, now we can have fun planning together and I’ll have someone to talk weddings with.
c.) I suppose I’m happy for her but I’m a bit miffed to have had my thunder stolen. I’ll have to make my wedding way better than hers.
d.) HOW DARE SHE? If she gets married before me, I’ll kill her.
And finally… your dream wedding would be:
a.) Any scenario where I get to marry my amazing husband to be!
b.) A nice, intimate ceremony with personal touches and close friends and family attending.
c.) Something either stylish or a bit quirky and retro. I want people to talk about it afterwards.
d.) Big, lavish and, of course, all eyes on me. I want my fairytale.
And now it’s time for the results… DRUM ROLL PLEASE!
Woah, you’re one chilled out chick. Some might say too chilled out. It’s lovely that you’re so blissed out with your groom, you’re willing to get married any way, anywhere. But remember, a wedding won’t plan itself. So either hire a planner for those details, or perhaps take on a little Bridezilla vibe to motivate you. Either way, have an amazing day.
You’ve got it pretty much figured out. You might occasionally slip into Bridezilla mode (which, let’s face it, is hard not to do) but you have a good grasp of what’s most important and don’t tend to forget it. Just make sure you think your decisions through carefully before you rush into what seems like the easiest option.
Careful there, is that a little fire I see coming from your nostrils? Only joking. You’re passionate about your wedding and want it to be memorable, but make sure you don’t lose sight of the fact that after the party is over, you’ll be married! Take some time out from planning every now and then to spend some quality time with your groom.
OK, step awayyyy from the cake knife! You’re either the world’s most organised bride or… it may be time to admit the truth. You’re a Bridezilla. Just remember, your wedding isn’t all about you. And the most important thing is getting married, so don’t ruin the day for yourself by getting worked up if something isn’t right. I’d suggest some hot Horlicks, a bubble bath and if all else fails, a strong tranquliser. Juuust kidding!